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    October 21

    病

          
           它在我毫无防备的夜晚来袭。
           白天我还仿似一株植物般的蜷在阳台，微微伸展苍白无力的四肢，好像我也是依靠光合作用来维持生命的一样，一直晒到那份慵懒通电般的布满全身，晒到每个关节都微醉地呻吟，晒到骨头发酥...
           而当黄昏用乌灰色印染了整片天，阳光散去，我的惶恐便如同蔓藤般疯狂生长，不可遏抑。我像个偏执的孩子，打翻了所有香水瓶子都找寻不到熟悉的味道一样精神紧张，包裹着宽大的羊绒披肩，瑟缩在沙发的角落里，忽然想到冬天，那个令我惧怕了多年的名词，现在于我却有一种莫名兴奋的渴望。原来在这个爱情枯萎的季节，依然有沸腾的血液在身体内流淌。
           我摆弄着欠费的手机，克制自己不要去续费，因为我害怕不论在哪个屋子都会时常幻听般的以为它在响。终于，它变成了哑巴，我怎会不庆幸呢？庆幸每个晚上头痛欲裂的失眠，让我得以在混沌了一天之后冷静清醒地剖析自己，像剥开一棵卷心菜一样，一层一层地直到发现最中间溃烂的菜心，才明白那些鲜亮青绿的菜叶不过是一些虚伪的遮蔽而已。
           于是继续欺骗生活，生活也一如既往地麻痹我，这样相互着乐此不疲。如同每个午后享受植物般的阳光生活，眯着眼睛，看窗外水面上晃动的树影，风却依旧寒凉，那些晚秋的叶子，一齐扭摆着，阳光融进它们泛黄的身体；可一旦脱离枝干，那欢跃的舞姿，那鲜黄的光泽，都顿时消失，随着叶子一起飘落，纵有千般无奈，在空中叹息着旋两个圈，却终究要黯然落地。它曾经的无比骄傲是否也都在这一瞬间支离破碎了呢？
           If I'm down , would you be my standing ground ？
           以为自己封裹得很严密，它却在这样一个毫无防备的夜晚来袭。
    11:47:46 AM | Blog it

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