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    November 30

           亲爱的,你好吗?我在这里很好。天日晴和,日子平寂,每一天都过得与昨天相似,我觉得我可以在这里老去又死去,直至白骨枯朽,漠然归于大地。
           亲爱的,我想离开这里了。去一个炎热而放诞的国家。我想坐在佛塔的顶端,看青白莲花剧烈生长,浮萍转眼覆盖水面,万物旋生旋死。
           亲爱的,我已经不去思考关于永恒和虚无的一切了。世上有的是永恒,而你是虚无,我是琐碎。你说对吗?
           亲爱的。我已获得内心的平静。无望,无予,无求。如果我们今天相遇,该是可以安然相处一辈子不是吗。我已经抛弃你爱的特质,成为一个平淡无味的女子,你不会再爱上我,但是你会娶我,我们平安度日。
           这是谎言。
           亲爱的,我对你说过我将离去。而事实上,我仍然在这里。我期望一个戏剧性的结束,而事实上,我仍然在继续。我已经习惯于象浪费粮食一样浪费我的生命,我知道它将会空过,然后永不重来。这样很好。
           这也是谎言。
           我坐在这里,写信给你。当然,这是虚空。
           每日我不动声色地回忆,试图记起关于你的一切,这也是虚空。
           突然我记起你的脸,这样我就老了。

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    Johnnywrote:
    路过,来看看你~~
    Dec. 20

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